The way to gain anything is to lose it!

Recently I had an eureka moment, I had a deep understanding of one of life's basic fundas.... a very simple truth of life came to my realization  And when it struck me, I was awestruck by the beauty and meaning of the simple sentence.

   " The way to gain anything is to lose it! "

I realized that the only way to keep something is to let it go. If you hold it back, it will repel. Tying something to yourself is like ensuring that it will leave you very quickly. And if you let something go freely, be sure, it is yours. I have had numerous experiences working on the same formula, but the calculation dawned to be just now. It is only now that I realized that my holding on to things just did the opposite of what I wanted. The tighter I held onto it, the fiercer it fought to free itself away from me, and the more freedom I gave, the more it clung on to me. Freedom, truly is one of the most important virtues of life. To give freedom, is one of the biggest life's lessons learnt, and to utilize your freedom, shows your maturity.

Recently, I was in a great mental despair. I was almost depressed. It pained me to think that even after so much of yearning and wanting, so much of following and observing, the thing that I wanted kept going away from me. I didnt realize it, that it was me myself who was repelling it by my constant obsession with it. Day and night, my only thought was of the object of my want. I didnt realize that by constantly thinking about it, I was repelling it instead of attracting it to myself. My despair lead me to many sleepless nights. My mind was in a turmoil. It was a fight between my patience and my obsession. I was going through a rough phase, and I wanted the answer to all my queries. And then suddenly I found my answer, in the most unexpected place, with the most unexpected person, at the most unexpected time. It was a revelation  The result was enlightening. I felt like a fool. I laughed at myself for being such a big fool. I laughed at myself for being so naive and ignorant.

There are many times in our lives when we care for something, and cling to it, not wanting to let it go. But no matter how much we try to hold it close to ourselves, it repels and goes further away from us. The harder we try to hold it back, the more it struggles to go away from us. And if we let it go, it comes back to us on its own. Thats the beauty of freedom. Thats the power of patience. Ofcourse, it requires you to be patient...very patient, but doesnt wine require patience to grow old and good !

So next time you feel like tying something down to yourself because it is too dear to let go, try this - let it go, and wait for it to come back on its own. It will. Trust me.

Goodbye.... !

I think its time to write to you now. Though I know I dont have to write something to you to convey it to you anymore. You can read my mind and thoughts. Its time I let you go, cz I know and believe very strongly that, the way to gain anything is to let it go.' And I feel its time I let you go, so that you can come back on your own, and I know you will come back, you have to come back!

The past few days were very bad, yes ofcourse I blame you for that. I'm not going to be sugary sweet like everyone else, I have never been like that, and I will never be. You. Yes, you are the reason for my sudden outburst of tears, for my sudden tiredness, for my sudden depression in the past few days. Yes, I have a bag full of complaints for you, and you should be ashamed of that. Never. Never ever have you given me a such a chance before, but today is different. I hope you can see everything from up there. I hope the vision from up there is very clear. I dont need to say anymore. You must have already seen your parents, your friends, me...everyone! Do you still need me to say anything else?  No, I wont! Silence kills the most, and I want you to be ashamed for your silence. Your eternal silence.

I still remember that day, when I first spoke to you. Although it is very hazy now, but the imprints are very deep. I had asked for your moral science notebook. The decorative and creative cover that you had put, had caught my eyes the very second you placed it on your desk. I know what you told your mom about me. 'There's a new girl in my class. She's fair and tall and thin, and eats a lot of butter. On top of that brings an apple too, and finished it all before the bell rings.' Aunty had told me this plenty of times. I had always smiled at this description. Had I known, you were to go so soon, I would have asked for some more memories of ours, spend more time with you, been more kind to you...if only I had known.....

Do you remember, when we had just started reading Nancy Drew books, and we both wanted to be detectives? I had written my first invisible letter to you with orange juice, and you had ironed it and read it? It was my first invitation to you to my colony. I had invited you and uncle - aunty to my colony for navratri. We had played garba all night. Those were the initial days of our everlasting bonding, the friendship which eventually made many people jealous! Maybe even God....

Do you remember our badminton games? All winter nights...just you, me and badminton. We would play till the shuttle cork would turn nothing but a few crooked feathers. Dont you remember those hopscotch games? When we bruised our knees and sprained our ankles? Dont you remember those cycling sessions? When I taught you how to cycle? Dont you remember those evenings when we would ride all around my colony? Dont you remember the times when you fell down and bruised your knees and elbows? You never cried...but aunty would come running to see if you were fine. The times when you would panic and leave your cycle and just simply step down and stand aside, while your cycle would go and dash the object infront. I wish I had taught you not to panic too....

Do you remember our cycle races? While returning home from school, we would have cycling races with each other, or sometimes with some other group of our school or any other random school. All we needed was a group of cyclers, and we would instinctively go racing with them! Do you remember the times when we discovered the huge empty road (now it flaunts the famous restaurant - Timeless), and we'd race there for 10-15 minutes everyday, before getting exhausted and heading our home. I wish I had made you cycle with me on the highway too, so that you would get rid of your highway-phobia too.....

Do you remember those endless and tireless dance rehearsals we had together? That one song on which we danced almost 5 times...'badle se badla nahi jaega....' Those straw ornaments we made together for the entire group. And the countless classes we bunked together to practice dance. Later, our rehearsal center became your house. And those small refreshments of juices and bhel that aunty would hand us. Dont you remember our group dance competition? The bengali dance group. Your house was our rehearsal center  and we would all rush home, have lunch, and immediately head back to your place for the countless dance practices. We both had choreographed the entire song. And we had won the 2nd prize too! Hadn't that group done classical dance...that first prize was ours! Dont you still remember the tune of that song? Shohag chand bodoni dhoni naacho toh dekhi.... bala naacho toh dekhi.... bala naacho toh dekhi.... bala naacho toh dekhi.....

Dont you remember our early morning bike rides? Your early morning wake up call, and I'd so sleepily say, 'Yaar, kal chalte hai, aj tu bhi so jaa, main bhi so rhi hun.' Dont you remember it all? Dont you remember our outings? Marine drive, chaupati, oxford bookstore, borivli national park.... I wish I had spend more time with you......

Dont you remember it all. I know, you are in a much better place now. I believe that. I know you He called you up there, cz maybe he needed you more than we do. But, dont you think 20 years is way too less to live life fully? I know it is. I know, there were many more things yet to be done, yet to be enjoyed, yet to be faced. But maybe he really did need someone as good, as honest, as pure and as silly like you. Or wait, I know why he called you. He needed a girl who talked like a boy! And trust me, there was none other in this world than you! And aren't you enjoying there? No books...no exams...no studies... just TV and Tang the whole day. And a pinch of your paan masala after meal, can heaven be any more enjoyable?!

Its time I let you go, only then can you return back quickly. Its time to say goodbye. There are many more things to be said, many many confessions to be made, many many things to be shared. And I will share them with you, its a promise! Whenever things will go out of my control, whenever things are too much for me to handle, whenever I need to share something, I will write to you. Thats how how we express ourselves best, dont we? I will keep writing visible and invisible letters always. Just one request, do reply to them all....cz I will always be waiting for replies.

PS - My oldest and one of the bestest friend - Titiksha Garg, met with a road accident on 30th october and passed away. It is to her. Although I say I have let her go, I have said goodbye...but it is not really that easy! It is going to take me sometime to bid her adieu. But it is one fact I truly believe in, that she is in a much better place right now, and I am happy for her!
Cheers Titiksha ! :)

They say.........

They say, you are not the same anymore, you have changed! I look at them sarcastically and think to myself, yes I'm no more the same, I have changed, when did I deny that. I know I'm no more that sweet girl who'd listen to all your non-sense with a lock on her lips. Yes, I have changed. I dont do every damn thing that you tell me to, I am no more your puppet, and yes I have changed. I use my head, I take my own decisions and I decide whats right and wrong for me. Yes, I have changed, changed for better.

They say, you no longer are what you used to be, and I say, yes, when did I tell you I'll always be the same. When did I promise I'll never change. Did I take an oath to be with you forever? No. So how did you assume I'll always be what I used to be then. I say, it is your fault not mine. Yes, I am no longer the person who I used to be, but I never said I'll never change.

They say, you no longer have time for me, and I say, yes I dont have time for you. Yes, you no longer in my priority list. Yes, I prefer meeting other people over you. Yes, I prefer talking to other people and not you. But when did I sign a contract with you, stating I'll always talk to you. When did I say you will be the only person on my contact list. When did I say you will be my priority forever. When did I promise not to talk to other people over you.

They say, you dont care anymore, and I say, true, I dont care anymore. When did I say I'll always care for you. When did I promise I'll always be at your side. When did I say you'll always be on my mind. True, I have other people to care about. Yes, you are not the only one in my life. So, stop expecting things to freeze in the past, where you are so stuck up, and move on.

They say, you look different! I know what they mean, they mean, you look ugly, but hell yeah, when did I tell you I'll always look my best. I do have a mirror at home, and trust me, I look at at it everytime before stepping out. So I know I look ugly, but when did I say I always look beautiful. I am not a plastic face, or a face plastered with plastic, so I look as I am, the true me, the natural me, and I know how I look. Yes, I look different, but did I promise to look the same ever!

They say, they said, and they will keep saying. But I never said I'll keep listening to them. I never promised I'll always do what they feel I should be doing. I never said I'll be what they want me to be. I am what I am, and I give a f*** at what they think I should be doing!!

Squeeze me like a lemon....!

Dear life,

There have been so many times when you have squeezed me like a lemon, crushed me like a sugar-cane, blended me like the coriander leaves and grated me like the onions, to bring out the best in me, and you have succeeded very successfully in doing that. And I am thankful for all that, yes I am! You've made me stronger and helped me grow like the coconut... strong, stout and hard from the outside, but soft and creamy from inside. I'm glad for that, yes I am! You've taught me so many things in all these 20 years that I can only be thankful to you. You have shown me success and failures too! There have been times when I sat in the corner and cried, but you have shown me moments too, when I proudly flaunt and rave about my achievements. You have given me many gold medals, and you have given me red lines in my report-cards too! You have shown me the good and the bad about various things in life, and made me wiser, and I thank you today for everything you have done and given me. There have been times when I fell down and scrapped my knees and shed tears that could fill a river, but you have also taught me that falling is the first step towards rising! Without failure there is no succes, without tears there is no happiness, and without night there cannot be a day.

I thank you for making me realize your value and importance. There are times when you have been unfair, unjust, rude and mean to me, or so I have felt, but you have always made me realize that with every bad thing comes a good thing. You have made me cry but you have made me laugh harder. You have pushed me into depression but you have given me tons of memories to cherish too! You have closed many doors on my face, but you have opened many new doors too! You have locked me in the dark room but you have also always slid in a candle and a matchbox to keep me company and get rid of the darkness around me. I have fallen many a times but you have always sent someone to hold me and wipe my tears and comfort me with good words and advise. You have given me many teary nights, but many laughter bouts too! You have given me a handful of enemies but a whole bunch of friends too. You have made me realize that it is not always the blood relations that really matter, relations can be build overnight with a complete stranger. It is not always necessary that whatever you do, people will do the same to you. Just because you are a vegetarian, doesnt mean, the tiger wont eat you! You've taught me to always expect the unexpected. You've taught me that no matter how perfect the lie is, it can never out-wit the truth. The truth, no matter how small and how well hidden, comes out of the closet at the end. You just cannot hide the truth, so better to tell the truth and skip the chain of lies. Thankyou for making me realize that lies never work, and truth is always the only answer.

I thank you for every little failure that you've shown me, I've learned so much from them. You've taught me that failures are not just failures, they are the must-haves for success. A person who has never failed, can never succeed. Success stands on a pillar called failure. So, the number of failures you have just means the stronger the base of your success, the only catch is to never lose hope and keep trying. Thankyou for holding my back, everytime I lost hope, and showing me that one ray of hope when everything seemed so dark. Thankyou for giving the best of everything I ever needed. The best of parents, the best of siblings, the best of guardians, the best of friends, the best of companions, the best of teachers, the best of everthing. I thank you today, because you've also shown me that, everyone in this world is not as lucky as me. Everyone on this planet is not blessed like me. You have not been so good with everyone like you've been with me. Though there were times I called you partial and mean and unfair, I didnt realise that you are way too partial and too good towards me. Thankyou for being so partial with me, and giving me all the happiness and joy and comfort in my life. Thankyou.

Life, you have made me the person that I am today. You have always showered me with surprises. You never cease to surprise me at every corner, every turn on my path. You've taught me that only change is constant, rest everything changes. We must not hold on to things, letting go is the nature and rule of life. Nothing lasts forever, one day everything has to go away...your friends, your lover, your partner, your parents, everything! Holding onto them just ensures that you cant progress in your life. Move on, enjoy the freshness of the new things around. Enjoy in the expectation of unexpected. This is life, and you must move on.

You have taught me that the only powerful moving force around is LOVE. Love everyone, smile at everyone. You might just make someone's day blissful and happy with your smile. So, smile all the time! Thankyou for teaching me something new everyday. A new experience everyday. A new adventure everyday. And most importantly, giving me a new day everyday! I feel blessed just because I'm still alive and happy! Thankyou.

But having said all this, I also have a request for you, dont squeeze me like a lemon, or crush me like a sugarcane, because..... Ouch! it hurts!!

Lady Narcissist!!

Welcome everyone!!

They say, if you wait long enough, you always get the best! And it applies to everything and everywhere in life. And today I'm here to share with you all my first guest post ever! And could it be anymore grand than having it on the blog which inspired me to start writing short stories!! Her stories awakened the dead creative cells in my brain, and now I try visualize fictional scenarios in everything around me... no, that doesn't mean I day-dream the whole day! I just try picturing unusual stories in the everyday situations around me. Just like seeing the world through a tinted glass, and everything around you appears tinted!

So, *drum-rolls*

 I, Aditi Ray, hereby, proudly announce, about my first guest post ever! And that too in none other blog than Mystical Skeptical Me!!!! *claps please!* xD :P

The author of this blog is Pradeeta Mishra, commonly known as MSM! This species is found very rarely, and can be classified as the best in its breed! I have been talking regularly to her off-lately, and she is one of the cutest, sweetest, most bindaas, and most adorable girls I've ever met! She's a lawyer by profession, graduated from Christ College, Bangalore, and is currently jobless! I've been inviting her to Mumbai considering at the huge demand and shallow supply of lawyers here, but she's hesitant! But voila, the moment I asked her for a movie, and pat comes the reply, I'll come to mumbai soon, and then we'll watch it together! :P No, she's not a retard, bas thoda screw dheela hai! :P But she has been most supportive, and so kind with my post and put it up in her blog, as a guest post! :)

So here is the link to my guest post. It is my first try with such genre, so please be kind with me folks! 

Until next time...

Cheers! :D

I have learned.....

Hola everyone....!
I've been a bit busy lately, and have been more on a reading spree than writing something. Though I have been writing constantly, that I cannot live without, but I've not been able to produce something worthy of my blog! Yeahh, just like everyone else, my blog too deserves the best! So, like I said, I've been reading a lot lately, I stumbled upon a blog and found myself reading every post religiously. This is the blog, and every single post here is a master-piece in itself. I read many of them and hugged myself for doing so. Though after reading them all, I decided to share one of them. So here you go... and I hope you too will find it worthwhile!
Happy reading fellas!!
Cheers! :D




I’ve learned-
that you cannot make someone love you. All you can do is be someone who can be loved. The rest is up to them.


I’ve learned-
that no matter how much I care, some people just don’t care back.


I’ve learned-
that it takes years to build up trust, and only seconds to destroy it.


I’ve learned-
that no matter how good a friend is, they’re going to hurt you every once in a while and you must forgive them for that.


I’ve learned-
that it’s not what you have in your life but who you have in your life that counts.


I’ve learned-
that you should never ruin an apology with an excuse.


I’ve learned-
that you can get by on charm for about fifteen minutes. After that, you’d better know something.


I’ve learned-
that you shouldn’t compare yourself to the best others can do.


I’ve learned-
that you can do something in an instant that will give you heartache for life.


I’ve learned-
that it’s taking me a long time to become the person I want to be.


I’ve learned-
that you should always leave loved ones with loving words. It may be the last time you see them.


I’ve learned-
that you can keep going long after you can’t.


I’ve learned-
that we are responsible for what we do, no matter how we feel.


I’ve learned-
that either you control your attitude or it controls you.


I’ve learned-
that regardless of how hot and steamy a relationship is at first, the passion fades and there had better be something else to take its place.


I’ve learned-
that heroes are the people who do what has to be done when it needs to be done, regardless of the consequences.


I’ve learned-
that money is a lousy way of keeping score.


I’ve learned-
that my best friend and I can do anything or nothing and have the best time.


I’ve learned-
that sometimes the people you expect to kick you when you’re down will be the ones to help you get back up.


I’ve learned-
that sometimes when I’m angry I have the right to be angry, but that doesn’t give me the right to be cruel.


I’ve learned-
that true friendship continues to grow, even over the longest distance. Same goes for true love.


I’ve learned-
that just because someone doesn’t love you the way you want them to doesn’t mean they don’t love you with all they have.


I’ve learned-
that maturity has more to do with what types of experiences you’ve had and what you’ve learned from them and less to do with how many birthdays you’ve celebrated.


I’ve learned-
that you should never tell a child their dreams are unlikely or outlandish. Few things are more humiliating, and what a tragedy it would be if they believed it.


I’ve learned-
that your family won’t always be there for you. It may seem funny, but people you aren’t related to can take care of you and love you and teach you to trust people again. Families aren’t biological.


I’ve learned-
that it isn’t always enough to be forgiven by others. Sometimes you are to learn to forgive yourself.


I’ve learned-
that no matter how bad your heart is broken the world doesn’t stop for your grief.


I’ve learned-
that our background and circumstances may have influenced who we are, but we are responsible for who we become.


I’ve learned-
that a rich person is not the one who has the most, but is one who needs the least.


I’ve learned-
that just because two people argue, it doesn’t mean they don’t love each other. And just because they don’t argue, it doesn’t mean they do.


I’ve learned-
that we don’t have to change friends if we understand that friends change.


I’ve learned-
that you shouldn’t be so eager to find out a secret. It could change your life forever.


I’ve learned-
that two people can look at the exact same thing and see something totally different.


I’ve learned-
that no matter how you try to protect your children, they will eventually get hurt and you will hurt in the process.


I’ve learned-
that even when you think you have no more to give, when a friend cries out to you, you will find the strength to help.


I’ve learned-
that credentials on the wall do not make you a decent human being.


I’ve learned-
that the people you care about most in life are taken from you too soon.


I’ve learned-
that it’s hard to determine where to draw the line between being nice and not hurting people’s feelings, and standing up for what you believe.


I’ve learned-
that people will forget what you said, and people will forget what you did, but people will never forget how you made them feel.

Organised, are you??

    Off lately, I saw my bedroom, study table, wadrobe, cupboards, drawers, etc. nothing more than a pig-sty. Sometimes, I wondered if I had queered the pig in his lifestyle. But as usual, I have my excuses ready on fingertips! To start with, my exams were going on, I had to study, organising or tidying things would have cost me dearly on my time. And its easy to find things when they are in just one-hand-distance from me! So, everything, that includes my books, notes, clothes, purse, cell-phone charger, watch, hair-clips, hairbands, comb, lip-gloss, mosturizer, bag, not to forget my cellphone and earphones, happened to be in that one-hand-distance radius! So whenever I needed something, I didnt have to waste time by getting off my bed and going somewhere to get it, just stretch your hand, and the world is at your finger-tips, quite literally! This continued till my exams got over. After that, the entire arrangement had to be distorted and the cluster of things had to be kept somewhere else so that my bed looked like a bed! :P  But the lazy clumsy lethargic sloth that I am, I just bundled up the entire mass and pushed it inside a comparitively empty shelf in my wadrobe! Ta-daa!! And my bed was clean!! :D

     The fact that my mom doesnt open my wadrobe unless and untill its something she desperately needs from there, kept the lil secret of my cleanliness, a secret! It was only a week later, when my classes started, and I couldnt find my comb... and my favourite hair-clips... and my dictionary... and my ear-phones... and my orange top... and my shredded denims... and my pens and pencils.... and my socks... that I started digging in my black hole, hoping everything was still there, and hadnt decomposed lying there! And well, it was all there, except for the fact that they...ummm...well... needed some fresh air! :P

     So finally today, after almost two and a half weeks, I, Aditi Ray, proudly say that, I have cleaned my wadrobe, 'genuinely'! I stocked all the books back on my book-shelf, sorted all the clothes as clean and unclean, set my table straight, put all the stationary back in the holder, plugged the charger back on the switch-board. ( Now dont ram your brain as to how my phone survived two and a half weeks without the charger, well, dont almost everyone of you have more than one nokia chargers at home?! :P ) Pheww!! My room is now genuinely clean and organised! :D  I feel so happy and good about it! Although I dont have everything at an arm's length, but they all are at their own places, neat and organised!

     How many times have you felt happy and proud of yourself after organising something, putting it in order?? It makes you feel like you have just almost instantly and magicaly shed some kilos from your heavy built. Makes you feel at peace. Makes you feel happier and more confident of yourself and of the surrounding. Makes you feel clean!




      There are many instances when my cleanliness-freak friends felt pity on my room and without hesitation cleaned my room on my behalf. They said they got an itching palm looking at my room, and felt happy after cleaning it! Ashamed am I? umm..well.. no.. Infact, I still call them home when my room needs a lil cleaning! :P  There was a particular incident when one of my friend came to visit me, and lost her bike keys in my room! Yeahh.. in my room, to be precise, on my bed! :P  No, my bed isnt a puzzle maze where things get lost, she just wasnt used to beds like mine! :P Her bed is always clean and tidy, not a peck of dust to be found in her room, no matter what time you visit her! So, whenever she visits me, she first tidies my room, and then we sit and chat! :P  Such strong is the cleanliness-freak-monster in her!! :P

      Yes, I too like things clean, tidy and at its place, in short, organised, but not to an extent that I'll go to someone else's place and start organising his room! Blahh.. I'm too lazy for that! But its surely good to have friends who are control-freaks, and cant breathe in an untidy room, saves you a lot of work you see! ;) :P