Organised, are you??

    Off lately, I saw my bedroom, study table, wadrobe, cupboards, drawers, etc. nothing more than a pig-sty. Sometimes, I wondered if I had queered the pig in his lifestyle. But as usual, I have my excuses ready on fingertips! To start with, my exams were going on, I had to study, organising or tidying things would have cost me dearly on my time. And its easy to find things when they are in just one-hand-distance from me! So, everything, that includes my books, notes, clothes, purse, cell-phone charger, watch, hair-clips, hairbands, comb, lip-gloss, mosturizer, bag, not to forget my cellphone and earphones, happened to be in that one-hand-distance radius! So whenever I needed something, I didnt have to waste time by getting off my bed and going somewhere to get it, just stretch your hand, and the world is at your finger-tips, quite literally! This continued till my exams got over. After that, the entire arrangement had to be distorted and the cluster of things had to be kept somewhere else so that my bed looked like a bed! :P  But the lazy clumsy lethargic sloth that I am, I just bundled up the entire mass and pushed it inside a comparitively empty shelf in my wadrobe! Ta-daa!! And my bed was clean!! :D

     The fact that my mom doesnt open my wadrobe unless and untill its something she desperately needs from there, kept the lil secret of my cleanliness, a secret! It was only a week later, when my classes started, and I couldnt find my comb... and my favourite hair-clips... and my dictionary... and my ear-phones... and my orange top... and my shredded denims... and my pens and pencils.... and my socks... that I started digging in my black hole, hoping everything was still there, and hadnt decomposed lying there! And well, it was all there, except for the fact that they...ummm...well... needed some fresh air! :P

     So finally today, after almost two and a half weeks, I, Aditi Ray, proudly say that, I have cleaned my wadrobe, 'genuinely'! I stocked all the books back on my book-shelf, sorted all the clothes as clean and unclean, set my table straight, put all the stationary back in the holder, plugged the charger back on the switch-board. ( Now dont ram your brain as to how my phone survived two and a half weeks without the charger, well, dont almost everyone of you have more than one nokia chargers at home?! :P ) Pheww!! My room is now genuinely clean and organised! :D  I feel so happy and good about it! Although I dont have everything at an arm's length, but they all are at their own places, neat and organised!

     How many times have you felt happy and proud of yourself after organising something, putting it in order?? It makes you feel like you have just almost instantly and magicaly shed some kilos from your heavy built. Makes you feel at peace. Makes you feel happier and more confident of yourself and of the surrounding. Makes you feel clean!




      There are many instances when my cleanliness-freak friends felt pity on my room and without hesitation cleaned my room on my behalf. They said they got an itching palm looking at my room, and felt happy after cleaning it! Ashamed am I? umm..well.. no.. Infact, I still call them home when my room needs a lil cleaning! :P  There was a particular incident when one of my friend came to visit me, and lost her bike keys in my room! Yeahh.. in my room, to be precise, on my bed! :P  No, my bed isnt a puzzle maze where things get lost, she just wasnt used to beds like mine! :P Her bed is always clean and tidy, not a peck of dust to be found in her room, no matter what time you visit her! So, whenever she visits me, she first tidies my room, and then we sit and chat! :P  Such strong is the cleanliness-freak-monster in her!! :P

      Yes, I too like things clean, tidy and at its place, in short, organised, but not to an extent that I'll go to someone else's place and start organising his room! Blahh.. I'm too lazy for that! But its surely good to have friends who are control-freaks, and cant breathe in an untidy room, saves you a lot of work you see! ;) :P

Birthday present!!!!

"Woman......  I want a blog about myself for my birthday as a gift. And its on 13th May. So dont forget ok, anyway, I'll keep reminding you about it, but thats what I want for my birthday from you!"
When I crink my nose up with a confused look, "A blog???"
She brightens up all the more. "Yes. A blog! Better still, how about a book! A complete book about me!"
"Okay..okay... A blog it is!"


So here it is! A blog as your birthday present! And I am so extremely sorry for the delay. I was so embarassed, you have no idea! but then again, all the good things in life are not easy to get, right?! ;) :P



 "Heyy thats a nice bag! My friend likes it a lot. She's Akansha, and I'm Ankita!"
That was the first time we ever spoke. And voila, I remember it till date! It was just that moment which predicted that we are going to be great friends for life-time. We have more than one thing in common and I often wonder what a mad house our mere company can create! She's funny, sometimes way too funny, and the best part is that she's serious about it! :P 


She walks hastily, texting on her BBM constantly, she looks up once in a while to make sure she doesnt bump into someone or something! Her long hair flutters on her shoulder, a few strands escape the crowd and fall on her eyes, she pulls them back behind her ears in a slow tradtional Indian manner. She looks up and finds me staring at her, she waves at me in a quick la-deepika-padukone-in-om-shanti-om-style and gives me a tired but happy smile. Her mind, eyes and fingers go back to her BBM! Her dimples brighten her face, her eyes twinkle and my heart goes out to her when she smiles like that! No guys, I'm not a lesbian... I just admire and like all the beautiful things in life around me! And she definetly is one beautiful thing for me! I ask her why is she so tired, and she gives me her longgggg story with every intricate detail that a girl would want to know! I feel like giving her a warm hug and saying 'All iz well'... but before I can do so, she cheers up, well, she has a story to tell! Her eyes play a naughty smile, and she starts with, 'areyy pata hai...?', and I'm all ears. Grinning and matching the light in my eyes with hers. I listen to her patiently, and while doing so I'm transported into another world completely. I laugh, I smile, I feel good, I feel happy, I feel sad, I feel pity, I feel envious, I feel jealous... I feel it all just through her stories. I almost live those moments through her stories. But I persistently ask her again why is she so tired? She tells me, she's tired of so many great guys in her life! Could I be any more jealous??! She tells me its so difficult to stick to the right one when the wrong ones are so tempting and cute! And I couldnt agree any more. But then again she tels me the good things are difficult to keep, and they are the ones which should be kept for life-time! I just cant help but grin, a big stupid grin. And we burst into our fits of giggles. We share our private jokes, girly jokes and giggle together. Her super cute smile trasfixes my eyes and I have to control my hands from not pulling her cheeks and giving her a tight peck on her cheeks! She's cute mahnnn... I cant help it!

   


She is turning 21 and prides herself saying now she can do everything that she did till date, legally! And if people who know her think she's getting mad, then well it is true. Yes she is getting mad! She's been preparing for her birthday for as long as 6 months, it could be longer! The pre-birthday bash is going on since 2 weeks, and the post birthday bash will continue for another 2 weeks! If people call me a social animal, she MUST BE a social monster! 




She's a keeper in all senses. She's a F.R.I.E.N.D.S. fanatic, and a completely cheesy F.R.I.E.N.D.S. fanatic! She is the perfect replica of the women we so adore in books, movies, and esp fiction. She's independent, mature, good-looking, adorable, sensible and practical. There is a queu of men behind her, all of them droolingly good, she enjoys their attention, and yet is a loyal one-man-woman! She loves the man of her life from the bottom of her heart, and could her life be more perfect! She's gorges on chocolates like she's on a complete chocolate diet, and then complains, I wish I could be like you and Aka...! Her mantra for weight loss is simple, "STARVE!". ANd if you can convince her to exercise or hit the gym, I'd happily be your slave! She can put any shopaholic to shame, yes, she's a monster-shopaholic too! :P




She is an avid book worm like me. She's not the mills-n-boons type, as a matter of fact, neither am I! She loves history and thrillers and a Sophie Kinsella is welcome anytime! She's equally mad about tarot cards as me. She tells me she wants to learn bangla, and I find her taking down notes of the lines and phrases I've just said to her in bangla. She's more enthusiastic about learning bangla than any subject or any chapter taught here in our two-hour lecture! 


I wish I could write a few more pages about you girl, and I sooo wish I knew you completely in-and-out-and-skin-deep, then I could definitly write a book on you, and you never know, it could do what 'one night at a call centre' did to Chetan Bhagat! :P In that refrence, I am J of Aka... She knows you so well. All your deep secrets, all your mood swings, all your madness! I wish I could know them equally well too!


And I apologize again for the delay of your birthday present! Hoping I am forgiven... and I lobee-dobee you shoo much bacchuu...!! Jeez, I cant believe I am actually writing it here! But then, I clarified it earlier that I am not a lesbian, so its okay! :P

Cheers!! :D

My Evergreen Fools!!!!

    Just as we enter into the month of April, 1st April welcomes us with the the 'April Fool's Day'. This blog post is dedicated to all my fools! Yep guys, its for you all..! And even if you dont know me, but consider yourself a fool, then its for you too! :P My life, somehow, is full of fools. No, no.. not all of you are fools, just a fraction are. Now please dont ask me to state the fraction! :P

    Okay, coming back to the auspicious occasion it is, I am really glad, that my friends have been dedicated a complete day to celebrate their uniqueness and speciality. Right since my school days, I treasure my friends, and well, celebrate this day of the year, almost everyday with them.

             The first fool of the post HAS TO BE... my school friend, best-wala-besty, a bong and my co-blogger - Mandy! I personally believe, God was experimenting when he created her. He must be thinking, how will  a species be like, if I give her a body of a girl, beauty of a princess, mind as big as a grain of sand, walk of a drunkard, and sense of humor of ...err..... that still is a mystery to me! And voila, Mandy was born!! :P  She truly is unique. She is the most hilarious and memorable company you could ever have! And the beauty of it all is that she doesnt realize it when she's cracking a joke! So, the result could be, that you are in splits, and she too is laughing hard with you, after you regain your composure, she will sweetly ask you, 'Kya hua?? Why were you laughing??' and bwhahahahahahahaa... you go again! :P  She has the potential to drive a shrink mad! And ohh... dare you walk besides her on the road! If she doesnt help you in getting admitted in a hospital with atleast a few limbs broken, then hatts off to you!
And and and... not to forget, the 'bwhahahahahaha' is her signature reply online or in reality! Ask her anything and she'll laugh first and then reply! :P

            Second in this list must be Star. Yes, she rightly has taken this place! She being a Goan catholic, her hindi is masha allah! Her hindi is all you have to hear to go in splits. She does things most of which happens to be for the 'first and the last time'! Yes, she experiments a lot, with foods, clothes, etc etc etc... and thanx to the result, doesnt dare to repeat them again! :P  She asked me to teach her Hindi, and well... now, apun ko bhi hindi bolne ka nahi ata! ;) :P

            Third comes another friend called Titiksha. She is a female with a male head. Confused?? I'll help you. Talk to her and you'll get replies like - 'Aj nahi yaar main kal ayunga. Abhi toh khana kha rha hun. Kal subeh ko ride pe chalte hai na? Main apni bakri (scooty) ko leke pahuch jaunga tere ghar k nicchu, ok!' And what more, how much ever you try talking to her like a girl, after a few hours, unconsciously, you too will have the same dialect! :P

             Next here to take the place is Veni. Yeaa... she has taken the back seat here cz she has never given me so many reasons to keep her in this list, although her phone always keeps falling from her hand, and her hanky... well.. you could say her hanky is a kangaroo's offspring! She always finds it on the floor where she had been sitting or standing. And yes, she's soo healthy and over-weight that give her a light slap on her back, and she could be on the other side of the road! :P  And she's always soo over-confident, that every now and then I get a text/call from her stating, 'Aditi, I donno wat to do... I'm so nervous... Just talk to me for sometime na, tell me what should I do?!' :P

            Not far away is Sumaiya. Yes, shorten her name, and that could be the end of your life. She is miss.perfect! Yes, she CAN sit at the powder-room for hours at a stretch, if her hair is not looking perfect. Always over-layden with accessories. A click-o-holic! She could drive you crazzyyy if something goes wrong with her appearance! :P  All you need to do to get her spirits high is, talk of her marriage plans, and ask her to pose for your lenses! :P  Although all these things doesn't justify her presence completely here, but you see, not finding her name here, even though its a fool's list, will upset her a great deal! :P

Did you miss the boys here?! Oh yes, its been a completely female dominant post, but boys, worry not, I will soon dedicate a post completely to you all!

Till then, Happy Fool's Day!! Stay foolish, stay happy! ;) :P
And all those mentioned here, I love you all! And those whom I missed, dont be so happy, you all still remain the fool that you are! :P

Cheers!! :D

Do you believe in ghosts.....??

   The evil and darker forces havent yet vacated my mind. Gosh, they are so persistent! Its like they want me to follow them, they are dropping bread-crumbs everywhere, leaving a trail for me to follow. Just when I was out of my mental ordeal about the darker forces and plan not to pursue them, an incident comes right front of my eyes. I cannot close my eyes even if I want to. I just cannot. I have to think and pursue them. Pursue them to satisfy my curiosity, pursue them to feed the burning flame of questions erupting in my mind.

  My mind tries very hard to dodge the question. "Does ghosts exists??"

  My logical and scientific side says, 'No. They dont. Its all illusionary.' My reality-bitten side says, 'Maybe, maybe....everythings not an illusion. Maybe....there is some realtiy to it. Maybe....they really do exist.'

  Our mind fails to understand things which cannot be proved scientifically, and it is right. We must find answers to a particular situation before reaching a conclusion, and those answers must fit the puzzle logically. Still, there are some puzzle pieces which dont fit anywhere. They dont have answers. They dont demand explanations. They just happen to loom in the dark, until discovered. These unnatural phenomenons occur all the time, everywhere. We just need to mark their presence and feel them around us. These unnatural phenomenons are nothing more than spirits - forces - energies. You cannot merely brand a force/spirit/energy to be dark. Its their deeds that tags them dark or not. Yes, they surround us all the time. Whether they try to control our lives or not is merely a matter of choice and nature of the spirit!

   After all this time of reading, listening and coming face to face with instances where logic fails and we have to give the situation a benifit of doubt, I have finally started believing in spirits. Yes I do. Although I dont blindly pseudonym any activity as a spirits' deed, but yes, when logics fail, science raises its hands up in the air, nothing else answers the question, it is then that we must know that we are not alone in this universe. Those in flesh and blood are not the only one homing this planet. Just like us, the spirits too have their habitat here, somewhere around us, and we must respect it by not intruding their space and privacy. How should we know if a space belongs to them? well... I have no clue in that sphere, and you better be carefull as to how you find it out! ;) :P

   Now comes the real question... Have you seen or experienced them??! 'Yes', says many of them and they truly believe of such existance! And the ones who say 'No', always find hard it to believe in such existences.

   Have I ever come face to face with these forces? No, but yes, I do believe in them. They have touched my life without touching it. They have passed my way many a times and I cannot help but be intrueged and feel mystified by their presence. They make me feel their presence without presenting themselves to me. They are not vulnerable to my senses but I can feel them around. The sudden jolting upright in my bed at night due to weird dreams, mind you, not scary but weird. And the very next day I find myself in a situation which feels so absurdly similar and identical. I dont know how, but it feels like I've already been in this situation before, and I know what's going to happen. Later, it dawns onto me, that I had been dreaming about it the previous night. People call is sixth sense, astral travel, telepathy, dream control, etc. But heyy, why dont I dream like this about my future happenings every night? Google may offer some scientific explainations, but my logic fails to understand.

   Just recently I saw the documentary-cum-movie called '?' (question mark) [the one seen above]. It deals with such a topic and answers my question in affirmation about the existance of ghosts and spirits. It also explains the presence of such forces/spirits around us and for a change, the explainations dont repel our logic senses. The phenomenons shown there too happen to be true. I didnt believe it earlier, and I am sure, anyone who hasn't witnessed something so violent as that wont believe it. While going through this mental ordeal, deciding whether they actually happen to be true or not, I turned to a friend, who happens to be a psychiatrist. His experiences and cross-overs with these spirits gave me more than just goosebumps. They got me thinking. My psych was made to believe that ghosts do exist. They too share our world and live in them just like we do. They too enjoy their space and fight back if we badger them - knowingly or unknowingly!

   And now when I think of ghosts and write this post, the curtain suddenly flows in my room with just a slight hint of breeze outside. I peep outside the window in this dark night and hear slight slurring whispers amongst the tall palm trees. I smilingly acknowledge their presence, draw the curtains and bury myself in my bed. I mumble a short prayer, and welcome the security of my pillow and the linen.

My Occult Obsession..!!

I wonder why am I so obsessed with the darker things in life so recently. No, I am not talking just about dark chocolate and coffee, I have always been obsessed with them, from as long as I can remember! Here I am talking about the occult practices. The occult obsessions. The prohibited things from our societies. The darker forces. The darker energies. The darker sides of almost everything.

Yes, there is a darker side to everything, to everyone of us. To keep it hidden or flaunt it to the world is ur choice, but the darker side remains with us, no matter what! It appears once in a while, shows its scarred face and again lurches back into its ghetto.

Of lately, I hav been reading the Shiva trilogy, and the emphasis of the evil and the good side of the same coin has only made my obsession with it more deeper and so much more stronger! I couldnt help feeling so completely entralled by the evil forces, but does that make me evil? Does my obsession with the darker aspects of life brand me too as an occult species? I dont think so. I feel engulfed by the darker hidden forces, but not so much that it blinds me and blurs my vision. Just the presence of such forces and energies around me is all I need to excite me and provide my curiosity enough fuel to keep itself burning within me.

A few days back I found myself reading and grasping all the possible stuffs I could about Tarot Reading. A strange thought crossed my mind that same night. Do I want to learn the art of Tarot Reading? Yes, my conscience replied withut hesitation. It the secrecy and power to answer all the unanswered questions that attracted me to it. The mere thought that I too can answer and know the darker secrets of life makes the adraline in my body race up. It is not just the Tarot Reading that I am intrueged by, Automatic writing, crystal balls, ouija boards, etc. too have caught my fancy. Black magic intimidates me. Psychs have always facinated me and not freaked me out!

Spooked, are you?? Dont be....!

Because without a wrong, there cannot be a right. Without dark, there cannot be any light. Without the mystical and mysterious, there cannot be anything bare and exposed. It is just the same fact that seduces me to these hidden corners of life.

Aren't you fascinated by the fairy tales you heard as a kid? Didnt they intrigue you? Didnt you want to know more and more about it? Uncover the secrets and marvell at the sheer breathtaking fact that they are no more secrets to you? Were you not hungry for more and more knowledge and power to discover the occult sciences and dig out your answers? Its the same fascination that drives me towards these dark hidden occult forces and energies with such startling velocity. I feel drawn towards them not to follow them or imbibe them but to enlighten myself about them.

I still am more mystified about the Serpant than the God who lured Eve into consuming the forbidden fruit of knowledge. The evil inside me laughs with an evil grin and tells me, You will never know, but it is that same evil grin which stimulates my walking pace into the land of forbidden secrets. Its the curiosity that becomes the driving force and leads the way to unravel the secrets of the darker land!

As I search for the answers to the hidden unanswered questions, my lips curl into a half smile and eyes narrow down into a deeper stare, the evil inside me laughs silently on a private joke which supposedly is not to be shared. Its a secret too. Ssshhhh....! ;)

Kyunki, Pagalpanti bhi zaruri hai....! ;)

 Just as sat to update my blog with another post, as usual, I was clueless and lost. Should I write on this? Or should I write on that? Or maybe this? Or wait, this seems better.... hmph! Yes, indeed I am lost! Lost in my world, trying to to give a peek-a-boo into my world through these short posts. ( Yes, these ARE short... comparatively atleast!)

So just as I wrestle with the topics and discard them with the speed of light, I get a call. No, its not from God, I am no Chetan Bhagat! :P  Its from my best friend, Veni. I tell her I am looking for a topic to write on in a dolorious voice, and she replies instantly in her usual bubbly voice, 'Hey why dont you write about our visit to the Xaviers College?' So here it is, my visit to one of the oldest and most glorious colleges of Mumbai - Xaviers College!

Disclaimer- To all you Xavierites, I am neither glorifying your college nor am I in love with your college, though agreed your college doesnt need glorifcation, the least from me, and well yes, you could call my feelings for your college as infatuation! :P

It was a lazy day in my college, lectures were cancelled, hardly any crowd to hang out with, just a few of us, with those few deciding to go back home obidiently. We (read as, me and Veni) too generally behave like those boring obidient students and catch a train and head back straight home or end up in a library or Oxford bookstore surfing books and flipping pages. But that day was different! We were in a mood for some excitement and fun! And generally, whenever we are in such a mood, we end up doing all the retarted stuffs without even a second thought! So we left our college and and started walking towards Xaviers! Yes, agreed its a 'lil long walk, but heyy walking 15 mins in the early morning wont do any harm. So we walk and walk and walk, and discovered its a 'lil more than 15 mins, almost half an hour! :P

Visiting the college was Veni's idea because she still hadnt seen the college campus yet. So le me be the guide, and le her be the tourist! I called up my school friend who studies there, she came out to recieve us like honorable guests. Little did we know, that we, honourable guests, would be stopped by the watchman for our IDs! How I wish I was 'Holly' and get an entry into the no-entry areas acting like I was the princess of Finland! :P  But no, the watchman, with his long handlebar moustache didnt seem mercyful at all, rather asked us too many questions on our presence. But somehow, we escaped it under the pretence of having some office work and managed to sneak in.

The college welcomed us with the old renaissance building and gothic architecture. The huge open space and the long stretched corridors made us feel like we happened to be in one of the colleges in a bollywood movie! To all those who dreamt of college just as shown in the bolly movies, this one would be a dream come true for you all! Yes, I truely felt like walking in a college from a bolly movie. It may seem utterly stupid and naive, but yes, I did expect to bump into a handsome cute guy, with the books and papers flying all around us, and we both go on our knees to pick up the shattered sheets of papers and books with our eyes fixed at each other and voila, we fall in love! :P But nothing of this sort happened. Rather I met many hippie guys with long hair falling over their shoulders, heavy bags on their back, a guitar or a trumpet falling on their waist, well... I guess I should leave this topic here itself. Moving on.. the canteen pulled us with its vibrant environment and we were lost there for a few seconds, digesting the panorama of the canteen and the foyer. Yes, we both were standing there for a few seconds with our mouth wide open, gasping for breathe, then we proceeded. What made us gasp? The crowd. The culture. The feel. The college!

If this wasnt enough for you, well... stay hungry, and visit the college once! There was more to what we did that day, but writing it here will earn us the tag of retards, so allow me to skip those parts! ;)

Before I cheat with my own definition of err... a short post, I will end it here. We left the college in an hour debating with ourselves as to why we should stay in our college and not change to Xaviers for our next academic year! :P  The only thing kept us back was their autonomy. Hell, I can survive in my own college for the next one year, but study for weekly tests which will be assessed during our finals and boards?? ummm... well... We love our college too! :D

"Taste kahan he???"

Where is the taste gone out of our lives? Where is the inspiration? Where is the force gone which made us work harder and harder?? Its gone, lost somewhere. Lost on facebook and twitter. The energy is spent already. The motivation is missing from our lives. I remember an ad of a chat masala, where people ask the same question in chorus, "taste kahan he?". Today, I ask the same question to myself. "Taste kahan he??"

There was a time when I was inspired and motivated about the goals in my life. My destination seemed so crystal clear. Even today my destination is clear to me, but the motivation to walk on that path, the inspiration, the confidence seems to be lacking in certain proportions. The proportions although are scaringly high.

The time when all I saw was my life, my career, my goals, my future and was inspired to strive hard to attain them is the time that I miss today. Why? The inspiration is missing! I'm not inspired to work hard. I dont feel like burning the midnight oil. My mind wanders on unwanted thoughts, I try to bring it back but in that process, I too get lost! And once I get lost, its almost impossible to get back to reality. Not that this is the first time its happening to me, just that its happening at a crucial time like this. Yes, this time is crucial for me, very crucial, and I must deliver my best and succeed!

I feel like Arjuna, standing in the battlefeild with a bow and arrow in my hand, my imaginary family standing against me, and I feel low. I am not motivated to fight. I feel too small to put up this fight againt such a huge army. I have already lost the battle in my mind and feel like a loser. I feel like giving up, standing at a point where I haven't even started. I need a Krishna, to inspire me, motivate me, and push me to do my best, work with my entire potentials and win the battle. But Krishna is missing from this Kurukshetra. I look everywhere for Krishna but he is just not visible to my naked eye. I need Krishna to show me his Vishvarupa so that I feel inspired to work hard and win the battle with complete dedication to my goal. But well... Krishna is missing from my version of kurukshetra. What a tragedy! Can you imagine Mahabharata without Krishna? No! Its practically impossible! It just doesn't fit the laws of nature. There is no success without inspiration, motivation and dedication! Even if you have the question paper in your hand a day before the examination,and you dont feel motivated or inspired to learn those few answers, you cant pass, as simple as that!

Why am I saying all this? Because my finals are on my head and I still dont feel inspired and motivated to engross myself into books! Oh Krishna, show me thy Vishvarupa! Tell me thy holy words and inspire me!

Books being my soulmate in life, I feel so heartbroken! Yes, this temporary break-up with books is making me frustated and restless, all at the same time. Yes, all you out there, who are nursing a heart-ache, I completely sympathize with you. I do understand how you feel, because I too feel the same right now. I feel ditched, but thankfully, the one to ditch me is my mind and my books. I want my zen back. I want my books back. And most importantly, I want my inspiration back!

So, I end it here, wondering again, "taste kahan he??" and hoping I get the chat masala back in my life soon!